Yes, You Can!

by Kay Heitsch

I can't help what I think! Yes, you can! We don't need to think every thought that falls into our heads. We do have the ability to choose what we want to dwell on.

There's an old saying, "You can't keep a bird from flying over your head. But you sure can keep him from landing on your head and building a nest!" speaks well to this subject.

I've known many people who have made their life, as well as others, miserable because of the thoughts they think.

Yesterday I read something on a doctor's fb page from the Cleveland Clinic, "Emotional pain lasts for 10-20 minutes, anything longer is actually self inflicted by over thinking and making matters worse."~ Cleveland Clinic Isn't that interesting.

Todd used to always say, "Mind over matter, Mom." when I'd say something negative. He had a lot of wisdom for his age.

When I started to study the Bible I learned a lot about the mind. One text that spoke to me was, "Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts." Proverb 4:23.

Over time I found, "This is the day which the LORD has made; Let us rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24 I put this on the refrigerator when Todd died. I knew I could choose to be happy.

I like the practical help I learned and this text is one, "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things." Philippians 4:8

I can honestly say these 3 texts changed my way of thinking. I started to think, "Yes,You can!" Because I also leaned, "I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13.

Making Others Happy

by Kay Heitsch

Today we are having our furnace and AC replaced.

When the guys arrived they introduced themselves. Much to my surprise two of the guys were Todd and Brandon. As most of you know that's the names of our two sons.

My quote, "The best feeling of HAPPINESS is when you're happy because you made someone else happy." I put this quote on today because I feel happy because I'm making these guys some Grandma Z cookies. Boy, when I told them I was making them cookies you should have seen their SMILES.

Yes, making others happy makes us happy too.

Being Kind

by Kay Heitsch

"It's all really very simple.You don't have to choose being kind to yourself and others. It's one and the same." Piero Ferrucci

It was a sad day. I was going to the funeral of a little boy named Bobby. Bobby had died after falling and being caught under the tractor driven by his mom, Sue. I knew I needed to be there for Sue.

While I was getting dressed for the funeral, I had a divine inspiration. A thought came to me to buy Lisa, Bobby's sister a stuffed animal. I knew this thought to buy the stuffed animal must be from the Lord, since I'd never done anything like this before, or even thought of it, for that matter. I left the house early and stopped at a local store and bought a cute stuffed animal. I didn't have time to wrap it, so I bought a pretty gift bag and some colored tissue paper. I put the stuffed animal in the bag and topped it off with the tissue paper.

When I walked into the funeral home I saw little Lisa sitting with her head hanging down. I walked over and handed her the pretty gift bag. Lisa looked up with tears in her eyes and gave me a faint smile. She removed the stuffed animal from the bag and held it close throughout the service. I could see that holding this stuffed animal was bringing comfort to Lisa.

This morning I posted a quote, "It's all really very simple.You don't have to choose being kind to yourself and others. It's one and the same." I could have dismissed this thought to buy the stuffed animal to give to Lisa. However, I'm very happy that I acted on sharing a small act of kindness. I not only was kind to Lisa but being able to show kindness to her brought joy to my heart as well.

Is She The One?

This past weekend we went to Columbus to watch our grandson, Eli, play T-ball, go to our son-in-law Joe's show at OSU, take the tour of our son Brandon's new home and meet his new girlfriend, Angela.

For many years I have prayed that Brandon would meet the woman God has for him.  As he dates each girl I wonder, "Is she the one?"

I did the same for our daughter, Shannon.  When she married Joe I knew she had found the man God had for her.  On their wedding day the minister said, "If you have never seen true love before take a look.  They are standing right in front of you."  As you might imagine I had tears in my eyes.  I knew for sure Joe was the one.

Now Angela is in the picture.  When we met her Bill and I both felt like she may be the one.  Of course, time will tell.

Drop it! Leave it! Let it go!

by Kay Heitsch

Why is it so hard to drop it, leave it, let it go?

Today's quote really stuck a cord with me. "The only thing that makes it part of your life is that you keep thinking about it."

How many times have I let what someone said or did become part of my life because I kept thinking about it? Way too many times, sorry to say.

This quote is a good life lesson! If we don't want something to be a part of our lives we need to stop thinking about it. Like the Bible says, "Drop the issue, let it go.."

Rubber Band

by Kay Heitsch

A few years ago there was a fad where you put a rubber band around your wrist. If you complained about anything you were suppose to snap your wrist with this rubber band. Ouch!

I thought about doing this, but to be honest I never did. I guess I thought I'd have a very sore wrist at the end of the day. LOL

Today's quote "Happy are those who take life day by day, complain very little, and are thankful for the little things in life." is great way to enjoy life.

Complaining does drain the enjoyment out of life. Maybe a rubber band would be a good reminder to stop complaining. However, I'd rather focus on being thankful for the little things in life instead.

What A Week

Kay Heitsch

When a new week starts we never know what God has in store for us. This week a year ago brought one divine connection after another.

My week started when I got on facebook and noticed I had a "friend request" from a man I didn't recognize. I've had this happen before so I went over on messenger to send him a note asking how he knew me. To my surprise, Guy was asking if I was the Kay Heitsch in the book, Have a Great Day- Everyday! who had written the letter in the front as the introduction. Guy had picked up this book in a used book store and he was reading it on a flight. Wow, that book had been published in 1991. I accepted Guy's friend request and he wrote a wonderful comment under the story In Loving Memory of Todd in my notes on facebook. A divine connections for sure!

Later this week 3 other men come to the house to give their estimates on painting we are needing to have done. The first two were Christians. I was still really excited about my "friend request" on fb so I shared the story with them. They were amazed to see how God was still using the letter after all these years. I gave each one a copy of the story.

On Thursday the last man called to say he was on his way. I was having an issue with a uti and I planned to call the doctor at 9:00 when the office opened. Wouldn't you know when I answered the phone Don said he'd be at the house at 9:00. I don't know why I said, "Well yay! I'll see you soon!" but I did in a cheery voice. Believe me, I was not feeling like "Yay!"

When Don arrived he was reading all the positive things I have hanging on the porch before he rang the bell. When I opened the door he said, "When I heard your cheery voice this morning I said to myself, "This is going to be a great day!" Don was smiling as he told me how he enjoyed reading what I had on the porch. Then he asked if I would walk around with him to show him what needed to be done. I had to tell him I wasn't feeling well and briefly told him what was needed as I headed for the bathroom.

When I came back out Don mentioned that he was surprised I was so happy even though I had some issues going on. I told him it was a choice I made every day. No matter what the circumstances I knew I had a choice what kind of attitude I would have. I shared about Todd and said I'd typed a Bible verse and had put it on the refrigerator years ago that read, "This is the day the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it!" Psalm 118:24 I then added at the bottom, "I CHOOSE to be HAPPY today!"

Don expressed that he was intrigued with this way of thinking. I shared with him, in between bathroom breaks, how my life had changed after Todd's death. I invited him to come in my office where I spend my time with the Lord every morning. I showed him my old Bible and how it's falling apart from years of study. I told him I didn't come by this attitude by spending time sitting in a pew. (not that I think it's a bad idea) However, this kind of life is a total surrender to God's way of living . I showed him the Dr Peale books the story "In Loving Memory of Todd" was written. Don was overwhelmed to see all the wonderful things that had come from the terrible tragedy of Todd's death.

When Don left that morning he told me he didn't believe in coincidences. He believed that he was meant to meet me this day as it was his birthday. I believe he was absolutely right!

Later that day I thought about the Bible text, "And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them." Romans 8:28 Having the uti was not good but God used it to show Don that with a relationship with the Lord you can choose to be happy no matter the circumstances.

Depends

by Kay Heitsch

There's a big difference in being comfortable with yourself than thinking you are superior to other people.

Many years ago I met a wonderful lady who told me this story about her husband.

Mary* shared with me that her husband was very well educated. He had even written text books for several universities. He'd made a lot of money and they lived in a beautiful home and took many extravagant vacations.

However, her husband was an arrogant, self important man who not only put her down, but he also put other people down whom he felt were not up to his superior level. Of course, her family did not measure up either. Mary related that he treated them as if they were beneath him.

As life would have it this arrogant, self important man ended up in a memory care unit. Mary would come and visit often as she was still doing very well physically and mentally. One day she told how she came in and was looking for her husband. Much to her shock and surprise she saw him coming down the hall. He was walking in his arrogant, self important way as usual, but he was totally naked except for knee socks and he was wearing a Depends brief on the top his head like a chef's hat. Mary had a sad smile as she shook her head and said, "If only my mother could have seen this."

I will never forget this story. It brought to mind the story in the Bible about Nebuchadnezzar in Danial 4. It's important to have a good opinion of ourselves, because we are told to 'love our neighbor as ourselves', but it's a dangerous thing to feel you're superior.

*Name changed

Comparing Ourselves To Others

by Kay Heitsch

This past week someone said something to me that made me smile. I was told that I seemed to be very comfortable with being who I am. Joe went on to say I came across as accepting of others, because I was comfortable with myself. WOW!

I've known many people who were not happy with who they were. They were always comparing themselves with others. These people have a hard time being happy with anyone who they think has more, looks better, etc etc than them. Seriously, what a horrible way to live.

I like to do things that some people would not like to do. Because I find joy in these things other people think they should do them too. We are not all going to like and find joy in doing the same things.

I remember years ago when I visited a nursing home once a week to pass out candy and talk with people someone said, "Boy, you really enjoy doing this. Maybe I should do it too." Well, maybe they should try it or maybe they shouldn't. Just because I liked it and found joy in doing it, doesn't mean they would.

Some people enjoy sitting in meetings. I do not! I know these things need to be done, but I am not the one for that job. I don't envy them, or put myself down, because I don't like to do that.

We are all unique and we like to do different things. We don't need to compete or compare ourselves to others.

The Bible says, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' (see Mark 12:30 & 31) I truly believe if we can love ourselves, in a balanced way, we will also be able to love our neighbor too.

Kindness

by Kay Heitsch

"Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see." ~ Mark Twain

I hadn't really thought about 'kindness' as being a language. However, after I gave it some thought I realized it really is.

I've been on the receiving end of unspoken kindness. Someone will smile or will give me a hug for no apparent reason. There's a certain way a person communicates non verbally where you can hear and see kindness in their actions.

I hope I won't be just on the receiving end of kindness, which is nice, but that I'll be on the giving end of kindness as well.

The Power of Love

by Kay Heitsch

I've seen what the power of love can do many times over the years. I'd like to share one story that touched me.

I was watching a murder trial play out. This defendant was a despicable human being. The day came for the sentencing. There was high tension in the air of the courtroom.

As I watched family members address the defendant hatred was spewed out of each one of them. The defendant sat with a smug, hardened look on his face. He was unmoved.

Finally, a woman stood up to address this man. I don't remember what she said, but her words were not filled with hatred. You could feel the atmosphere in the courtroom start to change.

All of a sudden this formally smug, hardened, defendant started to weep uncontrollably.

I was stunned to witness, once again, the power of love.

 

Moved and Motivated

by Kay Heitsch

It's interesting what will move and motivate us.

There have been times in my life if someone said, "You'll never..." it moved and motivated me to prove them wrong.

I've also been moved and motivated by encouragement. Both, proving 'I can do it' and encouragement have worked for me.

I still have people who say, "You'll never... with the added, 'at your age.' Quite honestly, it still moves and motivates me.

However, I would much prefer someone to encourage me to move and motivate me in my life's journey.  I hope I can do the same for them.

Good Health and Good Sense

by Kay Heitsch

Isn't is amazing how we take for granted 'good health' and 'good sense' until we don't feel well or we do something we regret?

To be honest, I feel great most of the time. I do what I can to take care of myself. When I do come down with something I remember what a blessing feeling good is. I've done things over the years I have regretted, but I've used good ol' common sense other times to my benefit.

Today's quote, Good health and good sense are two of life's greatest blessings. Good health and good sense are things we often take for granted until we don't feel well or do something we regret.

If you have 'good health' and 'good sense' remember you do have two of life's greatest blessings.

Is This All There Is?

by Kay Heitsch

I remember thinking, "Is this all there is?" while I was on vacation years ago. I was expecting, being on vacation, to give me more joy than I was having.

Sure there were things over the years that gave me temporary moments of happiness, but I often wondered, "Is this all there is?"

It took several years to not look to people, vacations, new this or that, to be my source of joy. I learned that joy and happiness are found in the simple things in life.

Today's quote, "It's not how much we have, but how much we enjoy, that makes us happy."

I've learned to enjoy the simple things in life, like hearing the Morning Doves, the smell of lilac and lily of the valley around our house, neighbor kids yelling, "Hi Kay." Our kids and grandkids saying, "Love you!" These are only a small fraction of simple things that give me joy now.

"Is this all there is?" Now that I have a new outlook on life the simple things are more than enough to bring joy to my heart.